Bernie Rowen-Ross invites us to practice authenticity this decade.

It’s 2020 and, yes, we’re still reading, listening to, or watching the news. Reading what is going on around us, even if we’re unsure of the source. Authentic is a word, I’ve come across recently. The on-line Oxford dictionary Lexico, defines it as: Of undisputed origin and not a copy; genuine. This is a wonderful word which is used in advertising and sales a lot. 

But, have you thought about how being authentic can free us from so many pressures? In my youth, The Beatles were at the top of their career, everyone wanted a haircut like Paul or John. The clothing fashion was led by Mary Quant. Pop art and mini-skirts were ubiquitous. It was so important to be ‘in with the in-crowd’. Today nothing has changed for the younger generation, our children and grandchildren still want designer clothes, the ‘right’ phone, ‘right’ computer and games. And, what about as adults – do we feel comfortable in our own skin? Or do we still express behaviours which are unconsciously played out because of a childhood pattern? Does our behaviour reflect what we authentically feel? Do we actually know what we authentically feel or is it a knee-jerk response to a pattern which has been repeated throughout our lives? 

It is heart-warming when we’re free to be just who we are. Try this experiment. When you wake up in the morning, say these words, “It is OK to be me. It is OK to be me”. Feel where this resonates in your body, you may feel it in your chest area – in the heart chakra. When we connect the heart and head, and feel it is OK to be me, stress falls away, especially when you start believing it. But, so often we live with the complexes we have developed over time. Everyone has complexes, but not everyone is driven by them. It is often liberating when we become aware of the complexes which are activated in our lives. We can then recognise them, and deal with them positively. Remember, there are both positive and negative complexes.

Our need for approval is steeped in a lack of confidence, let’s learn to be comfortable in our own skin. Make this the decade you wear the clothes that express who you are. Why follow the crowd? Just because someone else does, doesn’t make it right. When we break free of the tyranny of following the crowd and become completely genuine about who we are, how we feel and what we believe, we change our own world – one person at a time. We can also recognise inauthenticity by following our intuition. When something does not gel, when someone talks to you, and it does not feel right – go with that feeling. When we are able to be ‘real’ with our partner, our children and our friends, without trying to impress or be better, when we behave in a way which reflects exactly who we are, then we are truly free.

Bernie Rowen-Ross is a Psychotherapist, Sound Healer and Astrologer, she works from THE BAREFOOT SANCTUARY
45 Melbourne Place, North Berwick | t: 01620 844 321